Lots of men think that they have the best fiancée. They are wrong. I have photographic proof.



Only a truly great woman would help you do this to your hair.

-Gary Milner

Watching the Fight

watching the fight

I'm not really watching the fight. The blue colour cast was created in photoshop. In fact, the tv wasn't even on when I took this photo. It was just an experiment for a series of couch potatoe photos that I want to do soon. Maybe even a slumber party series.

My stomach is healing nicely. I don't miss my appendix, I should have gotten rid of it years ago. I got the stitches (actually staples) out of my stomach last week and now I just have non-Band-Aid brand band-aids on my stomach to hold my guts in. The nurse let me keep the staple remover she used on me. That was really nice of her and now after future surgeries, I can remove my own staples. I suppose now that I have the proper tool for the job they will be using regular stitches on me.

I'm slowly gaining back the weight of my appendix. I get the feeling that appendi's (appendixuses?) don't weight very much and that most of the 10 lbs that I lost were actually from not eating anything for 2.5 days. I was hoping that I could use this to spark some more weight loss. Keep the ball rolling and all that.

Everyday my stomach feels a lot better than the day before. I think that I am healing very well.

Take Better Self Portraits

Everyone wants to take better self portraits. Here's how.

Appendix

Friday night my stomach started aching. It ached all day Saturday. Saturday night, I was on the phone with Melanie and she suggested that I probably shouldn't take chances with appendicitis and that I should probably go to the hospital. I told her that I thought I would be fine. I googled "appendicitis symptoms" there are only 3 or so symptoms. One of the symptoms is that your stomach aches from your bellybutton to the right. Other symptoms include loss of appetite which I had and nausea, which upon reflection I sort of had.

About a hour and a half later, at midnight or so I decided I would go to the hospital and see what they had to say. I figured I would get there be in a huge line of people waiting in the ER, I would get a chance to think it over and change my mind and come home. The worst case scenario would be getting in and being told it was just gas. Well, there was only one guy in the waiting room and he was waiting for someone who had already gone in.

(The American media are liars when it comes to talking about Canadian health care. We get all your channels up here and I don't think I've seen one true thing about how health care works up here. I know they are liars and even I was fooled. I honestly thought I would be waiting in the ER and have a chance to change my mind and go home.)

I didn't even have a chance to sit down before the admitting nurse started getting me booked in. I showed the other nurse my health card and she updated my address from my parent's house.

Another ER nurse took me to a room and got me ready she did some routine stuff, left and then after a short while a doctor came in. He did a similar exam, but I guess he knew where to jab and on one poke it really hurt. I think that spooked him into thinking appendicitis and he left for a little while. The nurse came back and took a blood sample and hooked me up to an IV. The doctor came back and said he was going to have me go for some x-rays. As he was leaving he asked what side the appendix was on and I told him, that yes I had googled it and it was on the right side between the belly button and right hip bone.

I had the x-rays at about 1:00am and then at 1:30am he said that he thought it might be appendicitis. He said that he wanted to keep me overnight and do a ct scan in the morning but that he would try one more thing that might work and I might be able to come home. The other thing didn't work and so I stayed the night. I woke up pretty early after sleeping a lot better than I thought I would without my CPAP machine. It was about 7:00am or so and soon my surgeon came in he took one poke in my stomach and I jumped. He said that's appendicitis alright. He hemmed and hawed about whether I needed the ct scan or not but in the end he just went ahead with it. After the CT scan, he came back and said that with the blood tests, x-rays, and CT scan, I 100% had appendicitis and that I would be getting it out that day.

I figured that it was probably time that I call someone to tell them that I was in the hospital. I ended up calling my parents I asked for my dad because I figured it would be less stressful for my mom to hear it from him rather than from me on the phone, but she stayed on the other line and listened in. They got there by about 10:30 and shortly after the nurse took me up to my room on the 5th floor. They told me that they don't make appointments on Sundays for surgeries but that I would probably be going in at about 3:00 unless I got bumped by someone with a more serious condition. My parents left to go visit other friends in the hospital and came back just before they took me to the OR.

The operating room has a lot more lights than ORs do on television. I told them it would be a lot more realistic as an OR if they would shut off the lights like on TV. Real operating rooms are also a lot bigger than on TV. The operating table is very narrow. My arms would stay on the table by themselves. The table has adjustable arm rests that they pulled out so that my body made a big 'T' shape and they used Velcro straps to fasten my arms to the arm rests. As they were doing my right arm the anesthetist told me he was starting. I was asleep before they finished putting the strap on my other arm.

Being under anesthetic is a lot different than sleeping. Time passes quickly when you are asleep, but for me it felt like I woke up instantly and two hours had passed. I was rolling back into my room on the 5th floor and Melanie was there along with my parents. I was extremely groggy for the next few hours. Even after everyone left at 8:00 or so I was still pretty out of it.

I stayed for two more nights in the hospital and it was a lot better than I thought it would be. The nurses were all very nice. But it was also very easy for them to get along with me and the other guy in my room. I think it makes it a lot nicer for the nurses when the patients are nice.

Anyway, my appendix is out and I have a huge cut on my belly. I lost about 10 pounds over the 3 days I was in the hospital. I'm pretty tired but sleeping well.

-Gary

Oops

Have a peek at the president's face when he realizes what he just said.

No Biting

nobiting

When I was in Argentina, I knew a young woman that had the tip of her ear bitten off in a dispute. Some little kids were playing soccer in the front yard and the ball went over the wall into the neighbour's yard. She went next door to retrieve it. Unkind words were exchanged and as she was walking home, wham! She was knocked to the ground. The next thing she saw was a gaping mouth approaching her and chomp! The tip of her ear bitten off.

I just wonder if the biters in both these stories use the teeth whitening stuff advertised at the bottem of this photo.

The Summertime

Self Portrait

I have been having a fantastic summer.

Playing ultimate, mountain biking, walking, running, swimming, water fights, Writing on Stone, Cardston, cooking, and photographing half naked firemen for a calendar (really), the list goes on and on.

I've had a few chances to practise cooking roast beef, my Thai stir fry concoction is fantastic. I'm planning on enrolling in a cooking course or two this fall.

I've read a few books this summer and it looks like it is a trend that will continue, I'm excited about it. I'm not sure what I'm going to read next.

I went mountain biking in Elkwater on Monday and had a pretty good time. I wish I could have stayed longer, or that I would have someone to drive me to the top of the hill rather than having to ride up myself. Downhill riding is where it's at let me tell you. If I get into it enough next summer, maybe I'll break down and get a new bike. I could probably justify it to myself if I started riding my bike to work, something that I haven't done yet this year but have been meaning to do for a while now. Hopefully tomorrow.

Gary and Melanie

Gary and Melanie

This is a picture of me falling in love.

My aunt Celanie introduced me to Melanie a few months ago. We have been dating ever since. I have such a good time with her. We go together really well. Everything she does makes me laugh.

I'd write more, but we are going golfing pretty soon.

Aliens

Arches National Park

Mom

Today we drove down to Moab to see Arches national park. It is spectacular. I wish I had been down to see it years ago. I hope to be able to make it down to go mountain biking later this summer.

We stopped a bunch of times to take photos and see the sights. It was our best day of sight seeing yet.

I recommend going to see Arches National Park.

-Gary

Machine Gun

Fully Auto

I shot a machine gun today. It was one of the awesomest things I have ever done. It seemed surprisingly easy too. I had no trouble hitting the human sized target at 75 feet. You do have to be careful of course, and shoot as few bullets as possible at a time. Unloading the clip would take less than a second and you would be all over the place, but I found that if you try to do very small bursts you can hold it steady enough that they all his within a small area.

They give surprisingly little instruction about how to go about working the thing, maybe it is as easy as they think, I didn't have any trouble.

This is what they told me.

This button releases the clip. This switch is the safety, it also changes from semi-automatic to burst. Burst actually is fully automatic. We would appreciate it if you would do small bursts and not just empty the clip. You put push the bullets into the clip like this, you don't have to slide them in like a hand gun you just push them in. The clip goes in like this, make sure it is fully seated then pull this lever back to load a shell into the chamber. Press this button down to adjust the length of the stock. Try and go easy until you get the feel for it.

It's not like I have never shot a gun before, but it seems that a person who walks in off the street would need a little more instruction about how to shoot a machine gun.

All that being said, it was really cool. One of the funnest things ever. I think that everyone should shoot a gun sometime in their life. I will probably stop in there the next time I am near Provo.

-Gary

Utah Trip

In My Hotel

I started off my trip to Utah with a fun weekend in Calgary at a Mid-Singles Conference. This photo is from my hotel room. I liked the faux wood paneling so much that I had to use it as a background.

I attended the speed dating and the seminars as well as the dance. Melanie invited me to go to her friend's wedding and so I missed the supper and dance instruction at the mid singles, but we got there in time for the start of the real dance.

We stayed for the whole thing and I danced to every song with Melanie, except for a water break and to reply to a text from my parents. I figured it was pretty important because my mom has never texted me before.

Monday morning we got up early and headed to the states. We got stopped at the border because their x-ray machines picked up my firewood in the trunk of the car. We had to visit the agriculture officer and luckily she decided to let us keep our firewood and apples.

On the way I just about lost control of the car twice, and by that I mean I lost control of the car twice and was able to regain control before it was too late. Before I got to Helena the was a pretty bad rain and snow storm and I hydroplaned across a bridge. Let me tell that my mother is a lot calmer and more helpful in a real emergency than when the emergency is all in her head. We started hydroplaning again in the Salt Lake valley as well. My rear tires are pretty bald and I should get them replaced.

I've been dating a really great girl. She's a lot like me. I always have fun when we do stuff together. Her sense of humour is just like mine. She thinks it is super funny to get a rise out of me, and she gets me every time for a few seconds every single time, then I realize what she's doing and I can't help but laugh.

In other news, I want to grow a moustache. Watch this video to find out why.

Ultimate

Layout

Today was the first night of the Medicine Hat ultimate Frisbee league. I had a really good time playing but I am really out of shape. I'm hoping that this will give me the incentive I need to hit the bricks and start building up my endurance a little bit more.

It was a little cold tonight but it was fine as long as you didn't have to sit off for too long.

This photo isn't me it's just a random photo from flickr.

-Gary

I Really Like Squirrels

Elkwater

I went to Elkwater on a date today. We walked around the park and chatted the whole time. I really enjoyed it a lot even though I got a sunburn on my arms and head. The walk was a little long, but I would do it again in a heartbeat.

I can't wait for my next date, but I don't have anything planned yet.

-Gary

Tough Guy

Tough Guy

I've pretty much always been a tough guy. You can see proof of that in this photo. The ladies love that about me.

I went on my date on Friday night. We both had a really great time. First we went to dinner, then a little drive around town that included a stop at the tepee and to top it all off we went to see Monsters Vs. Aliens in 3D. I had fun the entire time.

On Sunday I sat with her at church and afterwords we visited for about two hours afterwards. We mostly traded mission stories, which is always fun. She served in Guatemala, it sounds like things there were a lot rougher than in Argentina.

I can't wait to go out with her again.

night at the drive-in

night at the drive-in

I was thinking that we should go to a drive in movie, but they tore it down a couple of years ago.

Friday Night

handsome

My beautiful Aunt Celanie introduced me to a nice girl on Sunday. Celanie had given me her number a week or two ago, but I wanted to meet her in person rather than just call up a complete stranger. I talked to her tonight, she seems very nice, and we have a date on Friday.

She seems very familiar to me, I think I probably have met her before, sometime in my teens when I would go to dances in Taber, and I could swear that I at least saw her in Calgary last year at the mid-singles conference.

I guess I'm going to need to get all spiffied up for my date on Friday.

-Gary

Breaking Bad

Breaking Bad is hands down the best show on tv right now. 10 episodes in and I am completely hooked.

Walter White, the anti-hero of the new AMC series "Breaking Bad," is a chemist, and always defines himself as such. Twenty years earlier, he was part of a Nobel Prize-winning research team, and though he's down on his luck now and teaches science to bored high-schoolers, his voice still breaks a little as he describes the wonders of chemistry, how it features "growth, then decay, then transformation." And when he discovers he has inoperable lung cancer, he decides the only way to care for his wife and disabled son after he's gone is to put his lab skills to use cooking crystal meth. "Breaking Bad" is itself a chemistry experiment, an attempt to combine several unstable compounds - one part "Weeds," one part "The Bucket List," one part "Falling Down" and 12 parts Coen Brothers - to see whether they lead to synthesis or combustion.

I can't wait for the next episode to air.

Basketball Shoot

DSC_2343

I made a couple hundred photos of a basketball tonight. Tomorrow I'll narrow it down to 20, then edit five of them to upload to istock. Hopefully one or two of them will sell 10 or 15 times a month over the next year or two. I'm sure that I have five that I really like a lot. Which is good for me. Generally from 200 I have 10 that are nice and one that I really like a lot.

My new lights, the alien bees are great. I find them a lot easier to use than my Nikon speed lights. Maybe I just like the manual-ness of them, it is what I am used to working with everyday. Turn a dial, adjust the power and go. Not to mention having a trigger mechanism that doesn't rely on some sort of hard to figure line of sight.

I would like to find more projects to do with them. I have a few ideas lined up. Some need to wait for spring to be fully sprung. Some need to wait for models to be old enough to sign releases. Some need models. At least one needs a robot costume.

I'm particularly interested in the robot.

-Gary

Kite Aerial Photography

I really want to try this.

Unicorns and Rainbows

Unicorn

I listen to a radio show called, "This American Life". In one episode a woman is telling a story about a party she was at. Everyone was discussing endangered species and she said to the group, "Are unicorns endangered or extinct?" After a awkward silence, she realized unicorns aren't real. It is so easy to believe they are though, they just live in Africa, like zebras. After all aren't dinosaurs real? How much easier is it to believe in a horse with a horn than a giant lizard?

Anyway, I've been shooting grad photos. Photos of kids graduating from high school. I chat with the kids. Did you get your prom dress? What are you doing next year? Do you play sports or have a job? Where do you work?

There is one question that I stopped asking. Can you settle a bet between me and my assistant? I think that unicorns are extinct and she thinks they are only endangered, what do you think?

Now, obviously the correct answer is: Unicorns aren't real.

Too many kids don't know that I'm joking when I ask that. They are easily fooled by the way the question is formed, the way it assumes unicorns are real. The kids say unicorns are extinct in front of their parents.

I truly hope the kids aren't actually listening, just responding to my questions. Flipping a coin in their heads, extinct on one side and endangered on the other.

I'm sure very few kids are actually paying attention to anything I say, because when one is paying attention, when there is one that gets that I'm joking we can tell. The kid is having fun and playing along with the game.

-Gary

Talia and Scott

Talia and Scott

I did a basketball photo shoot with Scott this evening. I'm pretty sure that I got a ton of really great shots of him. His girlfriend came along to watch. I had a shoot with her and two friends right around this time last year.

They were both really great to work with and I had a ton of fun.

-Gary

Alien Bees Test

Gary_1868

I ordered a pair of Alien Bees Flashes a week ago and they turned up on my doorstep yesterday. I'm pretty excited about having some studio lights now. I have a photo shoot set up tomorrow evening.

In other news, Heidi broke up with me on the weekend. It's too bad, but realistically we are better as friends than as a couple. I could feel a lot worse about it, but at least I'm sure that Heidi put a lot more thought and consideration into it than Tracie did.

-Gary

Go Ahead, Judge a Book By it's Cover

I always thought that you actually could judge a book by it's cover and now I have proof. This book about human resources.
This book is available on Amazon and has the greatest book cover ever created. You will notice how the photo on the cover of this wonderful book fantastically illustrates the topic of the book. You will also notice that although the book sells for a staggering $152.99 + GST + Shipping, it is temporarily sold out from Amazon. There are two used copies available for $155.23 which means that the book actually increases in value after you buy it!

Wilson and the Cockroach

This is one of my favourite photos from my entire mission. My description is in this journal entry. Keep in mind by this point I had been in Argentina for a year and eight months.

Aug. 5, 1998

Today was P day. We did our laundry. I did all of mine. I have enough socks to wear a different pair everyday and still only have to wash them once a month.

I wrote a letter to Mom and Dad and one to Jeff.

I took a picture of my companion to finish off the roll and we got them developed, he noticed that there was a huge cockroach on the wall behind him and I didn't even see it!

Well while the clothes were washing, we went to get money at Coto and we came back to dry the clothes. When my clothes were dry I got my haircut. You know, it pains my soul to pay ten dollars to wash my clothes and then ten dollars more to cut my hair. At least she cut a lot off. I really needed a haircut bad.

We went to our Auchan to buy groceries, develop film and eat. We ate McDonald's. I love McDonald's. It's so good.

Anyway, like always P day was really fast. Elder Peterson told me that we were having the district meeting in Wilde, so we went on down there and waited half an hour, but nobody showed, so we left. I imagine that Peterson had barely got back with his nuevito and that Bates and Lawrence went to the chapel in Avellaneda.

My Aunt Alice

1 July 2002

My aunt Alice passed away on Sunday.

This picture is from the first of July 2002.

Heidi

Heidi

I like hanging out with Heidi a lot. Living in different cities is brutal. Having days off that don't match up is even more brutal. It is hard getting to know someone when you only get to be together for a day or two per week.

It has been really fun so far.

We went to see the Broadway show Stomp last week, and had a great time both at the show and visiting in the car during our road trip.

-Gary

Christmas and New Years

F07U8920

For Christmas I bought myself a GPS and I am enjoying using it. I haven't really had a good chance to explore places where I don't know where I'm going except for on my New Years trip to Calgary.

I picked Heidi up in Lethbridge and we went to Calgary for a New Years Eve party. I had a really good time. We went to dinner and then to her sister's house. We baby sat their kids for an hour or so while they went to their own party and then at 10:30 we went to the Dance.

Things in the studio have been pretty slow the last two days. I guess that is to be expected. The school photos are all done, everyone is broke from Christmas and the next major shooting we are doing is in four more weeks.

I'm really looking forward to starting the graduation cap and gown photos. It would be nice if they had already started because I really like to be busy.

This photo is a test of a style I want to try for the college sports teams. I think that it is a way of shooting that would really stand out from the way that most of the athlete portraits in the league are done. It seems like the type of photo that they could take a chance instead of going with the same old boring head shots.